Thursday, March 03, 2005

Is God good?

Hello again,

I haven't always posted insights, but I must say it has become most therapeutic. Sometimes it helps me to reflect and begin to write just what it is that I do believe. Not only for the readers edification but also my own. I have just left a season where I felt totally barren of God and even questioned my own existence. I lost my way. Depression seemed to reign in me and it was as if I couldn't break free. I felt displaced and had no desire for God. I also got caught up in an emotional situation that I should have stayed far away from. It seemed that with every passing day I sank further and further down until my entire existence as a believer had died. Some of the most profound prophetic words I ever heard regarding my destiny seemed to bounce off my dead condition and hit the ground. I seem to let go of everything that was important and hold on to situations that were sucking the very life out of me. I began to truly doubt my faith in God. I began to question God's motives and nature. I began to say to myself, what do I believe?

This went on for a long time. Months were turning into years. Somehow I knew God was still involved in my life but I had lost my trust in Him. Finally I had to say the only question I felt that I had to answer was; Is God good? I know many who may be reading this posting may be stunned by what your reading, but I believe there are many who have had a test of heart at this level and can relate to what I'm saying. Is God good? I believe this is one of the most fundamental components of truth a believer has to keep sight of. I also felt the pure guilt for even considering such a notion, but that's where I was, and at the time it did not seem that I could help it.

I heard Joyce Meyer once say that sometimes our testimony may just have to be, "I'm still here". That's surely all I could say. One thing I can say, through all that I went through, somehow deep inside there was the slightest hope that God was good. Literally the last hope that I had was the hope that He was good.

You see 1 John 4:8 says that God is love. Though it may be our darkest hour, God is love and His very love testifies of His goodness. I once heard someone say from the pulpit that God is love, but He can also be hate. I must say nothing could be further from the truth. It is true that God hates sin and iniquity, but His hate for sin and iniquity is motivated by His great love for us! Is that incredible or what.

If you are in this place where you question the existence or credibility of God. Start here with this basic question. Is God good? Start building there and see what the journey will unfold. Of course this insight is not for the super spiritual who are amazed that a man could even find himself in a place like this, but it may be for you who is trying to break through the pain and loneliness that life can sometimes bring. Be honest with yourself and with God. Begin to allow God to peel off the layers that have assembled themselves over you and have sifted you like wheat. God's love is endless, eternal, forever flowing towards you. Make the answer to this question, "Is God good?", your priority.
God is Good.

2 Comments:

Blogger Rob McKinnon said...

Hey,

I haven't read all of your posts, so I decided to go and read the rest of them. Man! This is really good! I wish that I could have read this about a month ago. It would have helped me out of a hole. God is good. I know that. But as I read this, I see how that revelation can be used as a weapon against the enemy that so often seeks to devour me. I'm tired of being lion meat. God is good. God is GOOD! He's good!
Reminds me of that tape I heard about how god is always the same - He's unpredictable.
Isn't it marevelous how He uses the simplest things to show how truly BIG He is?

Thanks for pouring out your heart.

6:16 AM  
Blogger My Safe Place said...

It is a question I have asked myself when I was suffering mental anguish and depression - so funny how as human beings our own frame of reference becomes our emotions. I feel like crap - therefore God must not be good.

10:14 PM  

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